Tuesday, November 3, 2009


So the games begin again, as were delve into our lucious life of proud depravity.

Miss X decided that Halloween would be spent on Captiol Hill in Seattle. For thsoe outside teh area, Ciaptol Hill is a progressive energeti area of town, know for its gay population, but just a fun place for all and always read for a party!

The streets were packed with party goers in all kinds of sexy and creative costumes. Miss X wore a wonderful dominatrix unfirom.. Practical, not silly or cartooish, that included a crop and whip on a her belt. I was forced to wear a humilalting t-shirt that said "Cuckold in Training". I was also in a collar and jeans and pig nose.

My shirt got a lot of questions. There a lot of people who don't know what a cuckold is and it made for a lot of humiliating conversation. Miss X was all too happy to explain to anyone who asked that I had an unstaisfactory tiny cock and that I was relegated to being her sexless he-bitch. Women and gay men found this especially hialrious and the pity from flamers was particualrly humialiating for me. My shirt engendered laughter, pity, ridcule and a hot young twenties something gal who made the little finger wiggle at me after whispering with Miss X.

As the night went on we ended up at Via Tribulani, a nifty Italian resaturant. We had a few drinks at the tightly packed bar and made some quick friendships. A good looking young and fairly intoxicated man dressed as some sort of warrior with fake blood and a tattered shirt that showed his muscular torso, began chatting up Miss X.

When I came back from the men's rooms, Miss X was in one of the tall backed boothes with the guy I'll call Sparticus. They were in engrossed in close chit chat and I stood stupidly at the bar, catching glimpses of them in the mirror. My angle was poor but I knew they were kisssing and imagined some under table groping.

Affer half an hour of anticiaption, agony, and curiostiy, Miss X tapped me on the shoulder and asked for the car keys "While you wait here, I am going to give this hot young guy the blow job you can only dream of". I was told to pay Spatricus' bill. While Miss ZX was arapping her talented lips around his cock in my car, I was paying his bar tab.

I waited at the bar for almost an hour, and when Miss X returned she smiled and gave me a long open mouthed kiss, and she whispred "Do you like the taste of cum?" She then grabbed my little balls and squeezed hard as a reminder of who was boss. We had another quick drink and headed home. She dictated an email to me that was sent to her Halloween fling, in which she made me tell him how great his big cock felt in her mouth and how she needed more because her hubby was so dinky.

She then told me that I wasn't allowed to cum, but I could play iwth myself with her supervision for five minutes, and then with no mercy and a knowing chuckle, she locked me back in my CB-2000, knowing she was leaving the next day for New York.

As I write this, I am nearly panting waiting for her return tomrrow. My cock is hard and throbbing and I yearn to please her ....

Saturday, October 17, 2009

We're back!

To all who loyally read out nearly daily posts, thank you! We took a break due to a very serious family illness/death.

We are back, bold as ever, getting back into the groove...

check back soon.

Saturday, August 8, 2009


Last night Miss X visited her friends as planned. She's known these people for years. The wife's name is "Charlene" and she is a reluctant Domme, timid and occasional. He is a classic small cocked submissive, ready to be molded and put in his place permanently. Both are ravenous for Miss X's input and interested I n her injection of confidence for various reasons.

The objective for the evening was for the sub, we'll simply call him sissy, to serve the ladies dinner and learn some discipline and good old fashioned humiliation.

When Miss X arrived, Charlene was in the living room having a glass of wine and Miss X joined her on the couch. Sissy was making dinner and after half an hour "he" came out of the kitchen in a tee-shirt and pink panties. Miss X was appalled and directed him to remove everything and to crawl to the two ladies. She instructed sissy to always have his head at a lower level then the ladies. When he gave his "Yes Ma'am" too slowly, sissy had a nipple twisted until he cried like the bitch he was soon to become.

Sissy was sent scampering back to the kitchen to finish making dinner and once it served, sissy was made to stand silently while they ate. The conversation was mostly about sissy's ridiculous penis, and Miss X's suggestion that Charlene simply refuses him sex all together and trains Sissy to be the bitch he is. The face that sissy remained silent, Miss X contended, was testimony that even Sissy agreed and that he clearly wasn't a real man.

After dinner, Miss X decides she would show Charlene how to reward a sub for a job well done. She ordered sissy to warm some baby oil in the microwave and prepare a cake pan full of ice and water. Excited the sissy brought both preparations and he was ordered to drop his panties and expose his cock. Miss X applied some warm oil to her hands. Sissy was excited, but he doesn't' understand that Miss X loves to give pleasure to big pulsating cock's attached to men lie firefighters or powerful attorneys. A little dicke'ed loser only get teasing and torture.

Miss X applied her hands to his little cock and it grew as big as it could. As soon as sissy let out a little moan, he was instructed to dunk his cock in the ice cold water until he shriveled up and begged to pull it out….Miss X and Charlene chuckled at his begging and finally relented. He removed his dick, now as small as a white raisin. Then Miss X asked Charlene to join her and they both rubbed the warm oil across his cock until it was hard and glistening…and just as we enjoying the total recovery from the icy chill, time for more ice water. The hot/cold alternation technique lasted five rounds until sissy was whimpering for relief. Miss X asked if he would like the ice removed and sissy panted "yes!". Miss X told him to remove the pan of icy water and dump it down the sink.

Miss X then reached into her purse and secretly put a dab of Ben Gay on her fingers and mixed it with the baby oil and began stroking the stupid little bitch and slowly his expression began to change as the sticky overpowering heat of the ben gay changed from warmth to burning.

"Would you like some relief from the heat, bitch?" Miss X cooed.


"But all your ice water is gone. You were so anxious to get rid of it, and now it's all gone"

The sissy shifted his weight and begged for relief but Miss X knew she had him right she wanted him. " So if Were to allow you to dip your burning cock into some ice water now…what would you do?"

"ANYTHING" he blurted out stupidly.

This was too delicious and Charlene looked on in amazement. Now the negotiations would begin.

"Call yourself a stupid cunt"

"I'm a stupid cunt Miss X"

"Can Charlene have any man she wants "


"And will you stop trying to put that little putrid cock inside of her?"

Sissy stalled, and stalled a little more. Miss X began to paddle Sissy and told him if he didn't answer, she'd put more Ben Gay of his little wiener.

"YES MISS X", he cried like the bitch he was becoming, "I won't try to fuck Charlene".

The rest of the story will publish in the next day….

Friday, August 7, 2009

Getting our groove back!

Its been a slow 'round c'here, as they say in West Texas. Miss X and I took a nice trip but it was not too kinky as we had limited time and sights to see, and both our professional lives have been a bit busy!

But tonight Miss X is going to see a friend of her's to dominate her husband. This is interesting and kind of hard to believe, but pinkie swear its the truth. These were vanilla friends Miss X knew before we met and she discovered over time hat the husband is a major league sub who occasionally wears a chastity device. Unfortunately for him, his wife is a bit timid and often afraid to play. Unlike Miss X, who you, dear readers, know is quite favorable to the idea of subjegating any male she meets.

The plan for tonight is to have this little cocked loser serve Miss X and her friend a lovely dinner while he prances in frillies. I don't know details beyond that but suffice it to say I am a bit jealous and anxious to hear the details.

I doubt he realizes how humiliaiting Miss X can be, but she has warned his wife that she won't be held back, she must be organic, its all she knows. You can't let a lion loose on a piece of meat and insist it use a napkin.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009


Its been a slow sultry sticky week in Seattle.For those unfamiliar, we are famous for our glorious summers. August temperatures are atop 80 degrees and few of us have air conditioners.

At this writing, it is a miserable 95! Miss X and I have been concentrating on sluggishly moving and keeping cool more than D/s, hence the dearth of posts.

But this weekend should be interesting as we head out of town for some relaxation and the possible escapade, so stay tuned!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

So many sub males. Really? I mean Really?

There's a grand deception in the D/s world. Well if not a deception a major misconception. Conventional wisdom says there are 1000's of sub males for every Domme. I say no, in fact, I think the rato of REAL Dommes to REAL subs is reversed. I think there are not enough sub males.

Hear me out...

Check out kink friendly social connection sites, like Collarme. You'll find many posts that show a growing frustration from superior Ladies who are in contact with so called "subs" or "slaves". and then a month or two later they are posting ratns about the "flakes and phonies on this site..." This is the norm, not antecdotal.

My theory is this: There are 1000's of fantasy life male subs and VERY few who are able or willing to put it into a lifestyle. It requires, cocnetration, faith, fortitude, bravery, chastity and abondonment of all that is comfortable. It all reuqires near infinate trust.

Likewise, there are many Dommes who crumble when put to the test. To top it all off, putting kink into the vanilla realm as is required for a true realtionship takes balance and epic devotion from both parties.

I'd be interested in your thoughts. How many men are really willing to become bitch silly cock suckers for a bad ass dame? And how many dommes are willing to train and disicpline and torture a pet? Its a lot of work, and whose to say he won't disappear after all your hard work?

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Miss X’s out-of-town new lover!!

It began on Thursday. Miss X began to ramp up her nearly unbearable teasing. She released me from my Cb-3000s and supervised me as I cleaned my self. She then had me lay on the bed and took a tiny bit of baby oil and began to make little circles on my penis with the tip of her index finger. I groan and moaned as its been a solid two weeks since my last orgasm, and even that was "ruined".

She breathed on my neck and made me verbalize devotion to her and that I was there for her humor, entertainment and would do anything for her. I recited the various mantras she issued. That she was in charge and that my tiny cock was never to enjoy her tight little pussy. That I was honored to suffer for her and remain chaste. After twenty minutes, I was delirious and nearly panting for release. She simply smiled and held back a giggle ad I air thrusted, craving release so badly.

She allowed me to join her on the couch and we watched re-runs of Law and Order and she had me next to her, nude, as she occasionally toyed with me. Cruelly, she ordered me back into the CB-3000s, but not with my unabated begging, which only ended when she delivered two hard face slaps and sent me to bed whimpering, dribbling and frustrated, a malleable mush, anxious to please and feeling a faggoty glow that I only get when so deeply induced into a catatonic sub-state.

Friday, Miss X announced that I was take her shopping. After work, we met in Seattle's upscale U-Village where we went to a very upscale lingerie shop called Zovo. She had me help her pick out two sexy ensembles and as I paid, the sales lady said "This is really more for you than her anyway" With a big knowing smile. I returned the smile and Miss X interrupted with a giggle. "He's never allowed sex with me anyway". The sprite late-20's sales lady gave a nervous little "Oh!" and I felt my face turning bright red.

Later we shopped at Nordstrom and Miss X picked a slinky black dress and some pricey Jimmy Choo shoes. When we got home I of course got undressed as is my requirement, and she modeled the be bra, panties and shoes for me. My tiny pecker strained against the locked up confinement and Miss X played with the key dangling between her full round breasts. "Of course you know pet, I bought these for real man, and I want you thank me now for the privilege of paying for all this". I dropped to my knees and kissed her feet, elevated by the heels and begged for release. Al this did was secure a firm spanking for myself and that night I went to bed with a very sore ass.

Saturday she announced mid-day that a handsome guy she had met when she was working in California was coming to town and she would be meeting him privately . I stayed at home and talk to other sub cucks on my cheap-ass Nite Flirt account (the paltry proceeds of which go directly to Miss X). My entire body ached for release, my body pounding with lust. Occasionally, Miss X would email me blurry photos from her rendezvous. I could tell they were in a nice restaurant, then back at a hotel.

When Miss X came home about 1:30am, she was exhausted and told me I would have to wait for this morning (Sunday) for details. Miss X told me to make her coffee and to report back to the bed room. She told me how handsome her need fuck buddy was and how magnificent his large cock felt. But rather than take her word for it, she said she did something special. She recorded 40 minutes of their loud fucking on her IPhone. I was forced to listen her moans and deep guttural cries of pleasure. At one point I heard her begging him to stick it back inside of her, and I could hear him push and grunt louder when he told him he was so much better than me.

Finally, with a look of sheer zeal on her face, Miss X told me I could cum if I met her conditions. (As if I had a real choice) I was to be impaled on a knobby dildo and she would attach two clothes pins to my nipples that she would twist as I came. OF course, I gratefully agreed and came as hard as I ever had. My nipples throbbing in pain, and I was fully satiated for the first time in many weeks.

The rest of the day we spend at the Ballard Farmer's Market, sipping wine, buying veggies and sampling various treats and listening to the struggling buskers.

It was a great weekend!!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

NEW POLL! and my frustration grows....

Well, nearly 50% of you voted that I should only cum on major holidays and my birthday, if I please Miss X. As it is, the only orgasms I am getting are ruined.

Our new poll is up and we're curious what you think is most humiliating. PLEASE VOTE!

Miss X is planning another outing with her new kinky friend Kiah. In the meantime, its been three weeks since I last came and my frustration is growing. Miss X loves to tease me. Just sleeping next to her warm, forbidden body makes it hard to sleep.

Recently Miss X wanted a cup of coffee and she had me drive through a local espresso stand called "Cowgirls Espresso" , where the sexy baristas prance in panties and pasties. Miss X's little way of keeping me stmualted. If the sexy 20 something only knew i was also wearing panties.

We are also palnning a weekend getaway to Portland, which pormises to be a fuck and humialtion fest.....should make for some blogging.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009


Our poll is winding down and the vast majority of your devilishly sadistic readers only want tiny tom to cum on his birthday and major holidays! Vicious.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

MIss X hits town w/ girlfriend...finds new lucky lover...

Miss X has a wicked new girlfriend, Kiah*, an edgy, tall gal pal she's known for some years, but recently they've been going out for a drink here and there and revelations have been coming. Turns out Kiah is wild and a bit of boy chaser.

One of the things I love about Miss X is that she is comfortable in any environment. Posh five star hotels or the workin' man's bar at the end of the pier. Kiah prefer local stomps and she invited Miss X to the "Hennigan's Road"*, an established local pool table and two handle keg house.

Throughout they night they laughed, and joked, sharing past ribald experiences and little by little Miss X is realizing that Kiah would make an excellent "partner in crime", for they both have similar likes. Big dick'ed men and a little hurt when it comes to certain men. They are both not shy to the thought of delivering a bitch slap to a well deserved male.

As the weekend evening out turned more flirty, Miss X began sending me photos via her IPhone. Two girls laughing, while I saayed home and dutifully did laundry, cleaned the kitchen and moaned and my ability to touch my puny cock that is locked tightly in my CB-6000s.

As the evening grew later, the photos became a bit more quizzical. A blurred photo of them leaving the bar, what looked to be a third party? Hard to tell in the fuzzy Fellini-esque photos of dark shadows, green felt and neon. As Miss X told me she might crash at Kiah's house, I wasn't too concerned that I didn't hear from her.

The next day, Miss X told me what a great time she had with Kiah, and that she expected the wild play to escalate, she had a new kinky playmate. ( Miss X is straight and not bi, but game to go on the make and hunt in a pack) I Was busy at work and Miss X missed each other due to our busy schedules. But when I cam home the next night, there was a card waiting for me. The first line of the card told me to make sure to be wearing panties while I read the note.

I went and grabbed my black silkies, Miss X likes to keep me in a state of semi-feminized disgrace to remind me of my position when I am reading about her superior lovers. I knew this note would be meaningful. It was an over-sized card and the first panel was quite a lovely melange of remembrances. This is an anniversary for us, four years of togetherness, and she discussed some of the loveliness of making a relationship work. The second and third panel described what happened that night at Hennigan's Road.

Miss X met Kiah and her boy Toy Phil. Turns out Phil has a brother, David, and the four of them spent the night flirting and drinking until Miss X decided to go home with David . Miss X graphically described how great it felt to deep throat his large veined cock...my little member twitched helpless in its prison. She told me how she rode his thick rod to multiple orgasms until she crashed into a satisfied ball on the bed. She reminded me how she deserved this pleasaure and that it was my duty to encourage her.

I sat twisting in my pathetic pool of precum, oozing through my tight black panties, knowing that the next time we meet, I may be the bitch getting fucked by her big black rod.

Since the card, Miss X told me she fully expects to take Kiah to a swingers club where she gang bangs herself to sexual satisfaction. As I write this post, my body is craving release and my submissive nature is at full throttle...

*names of persons or local bars are changed for privacy purposes.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009


Last night was supposed to be pretty domestic and pedestrian, with the two of uswatching Miss X's favorite TV shows.

Alas, she had other ideas.

My little four incher securely locked away, she announced that she didn't want to be distracted by me whiel she enjoyed her programing. She escorted me to the bedroom, had me lay on the bed and made sure I was comfortable, and tied my hands. She then put headphones on me and took out the portable DVD player and let me know that while she enjoyed her programs, I would get to watch real cocks fuck tight little pussies, and I was to consider the whole time that I was never to have sex with her or anyone else.

She told me to pay particular attention to the climax scenes and how the girls swallowed and savored every drop, because as a locked up dickless wonder, that was my future too. For an hour and a half, my little cock pushed against that barbaric cage of frustration. My hard cock throbbing agasint the cage, the sounds of sex, moaning and growing, orgasmic squeals from women I could never have. A sound my puny cock could never illicit. All that pleasure is reserved for the virile big cock'ed men, relegating me to the only mission I have, and that is pleasing Miss X.

The DVD ended before her TV shows and I fell into a shallow sleep, my cock weeping droplets of pre-cum frustration, driving me into a dreamlike madness of libedo and desire. Cruelly, she came into the room nearly nude, chucckled softly, stoked my body lightly and kissed me good night, and whispered in my ear "this is your life, you pathetic cocksucking concubine, revel in it..."

Sunday, July 5, 2009

EXTREME TEASE....Oral dissatisfaction, etc...

Yes, these really are Miss X's lips and her warm soft mouth. Fellow porcine-subs in the audience, imagine wearing a chastity cage for several days, and falling asleep next to Miss X's amazingly curvaceous and warm body. Spending a restless night , and then waking up, craving, and needing her.

Hopelessly wishing that she'd accept you deep inside her sweet tight pussy, spooning her, so close, feeling her warmth, knowing you can NEVER have that joy.

She allowed me to feel her body, her large firms breasts, the curve at the small of her back, her womanly hips and the soft nape of her neck and she told me that I would be allowed to continue, only because it frsrtrated me more, that I would pay a price for the privlege.

Then unexpectedly she filpped over and slipped down and began to tickle my cock with her long hair...my little dick stretching as far as it could, falling just short of her parted lips. I could feel her warm breath and she taunted me that if I was a bit longer, I'd be enjoying the spasms of pleasures she only offers to well hung real men. Her perfectly round soft breasts grazed my throbbing dinky dick, and then with the cruelty of a true teasing sadist, she flicked her tongue but a few times across the tender underside of my cock and asked me how it would feel if she took the whole of me inside her mouth, knowing full well that was not on the morning's agenda.. I buckled and begged for release, but instead of splendid splooge, she held me down by the wrists.

This, my dear readers, was on Friday, the torment continued all day as I was teased, then put back in chastity. Each time, the teasing became more intense and she pushed me to reveal to her verbally what a little dick clown I was, and why I was inferior. I had to repeat to her over and over that I was a cum pig and that I since I wasn't really a man now, the only way to please her was to lick up cum by the bucket, procure her big cocked lovers and even other slaves to provide her oral service as I watch.

As the weekend rolled on, Miss X would imply that I might get an orgasm, then get me to be beg for punishment. She whsipered in my ear that she's craving a "good beat down", an ass smacking to remember.

With her taunting and tormenting me, teasing me without relief, I was agreeing to any proposition and this is always a dangerous course with Miss X. She loves solid punishment, and gets a lusty sense of satisfaction from delivering firm licks.
She then reminded me that July 4th was a "major holiday" and I might be given a chance to cum, but as the night lingered, she said she'd seen enough fireworks. I groaned in humiliated frustration and went about cleaning the kitchen, hoping to earn some favor.

This morning, she teased me to near orgasm. This time I didn't even get a "ruined orgasm', just as I almost began to cum, she grabbed my cock with the power of Zeus and squelched my orgasm as my body bucked and my spirit soared as my hope for relief died to her loud and resounding laughter.

Today she is out with a girlfriend and if I know her, she's trolling for big dick potential while I do bitch work at home.

Still working on finding a suitable cunt licking slave for her pleasure.

Friday, July 3, 2009

I'm so happy She's here! The Kink Cannon has been fired!

After working a half day, I invited Miss X to lunch, and off we escaped to one of our solid , favorite bistro's for a mid day rendezvous. Miss X was in all her curvy splendor, looking radiant and lovely. Btu before we left, I slapped hard in the face for speaking before being permitted.

At lunch we discussed the coming week's agenda, and she reviews the potential subs she's ordered me to procure to lick her hot little snatch while I am forced to watch.

After lunch, i offered to take her on a little shopping spree. Her beautiful eyes lit like halogen and the afternoon became a fun clothes shopping adventure at a few fashionable boutiques, a bottle of her favorite fun and fresh cologne called "LOVE" by Moschino and was finally completed with a trip to the chocolate shop.

She had to venture out and do some errands today, but I was instructed to care for her laundry, prepare a list of 5 reasons i am a cunt, blog some more (As this attests) and just before she left, she had me assume her favorite position for me, on all fours, head down, legs spread, ass in the hair,and my tiny locked up cock dangling in the air...available for nudging, and caressing them with her, feet, making my laughably short cock hard in its holster, my blood pumping, my desire building, my frustrating welling, my pathetic fall from manhood to bitchdom completed.

More to come soon.

Tic Toc, Tic Toc...

The minutes seem like hours as await my Gorgeous Goddess' return! I am now stuck in chastity, awaiting to present her the keys. I've been locked up almost two days now and the blood is beginning to roil, only to amplified 50 fold by her presence. I am carving her touch, her torment, and her gleeful smirk as I suffer for her amusement. I have never loved a woman like I do her

As part of my assignment while she was gone, I was ordered to find her a sub to provide oral servitude to her. I of course, will once again be denied and forced to watch. The trick, of course, is to wade through all the flakes and find the lucky sub who gets the treat I am refused.

I am excited by Her return, as there ar no major trips for Her planned. All that stands between us is our mutally busy schedules.

Thursday, July 2, 2009

LOCAL DOMME CELEBRITIES and other musings...

In Washington, we have two very prominent pro and lifestyle Domme with excellent blogs. These ladies are real, both have scintillating senses of humor and issue lots of pratical advice.

Mistress Matisse is a gorgeous, poweful woman with a wry smile, excellent taste and a prolific blogger. She's a must "Follow" blogger. Also, professionally publishedin a renown local 'zine.

Mistress Milliscent is also astoundingly beautful, and idolic icon of Seattle whippery :) and she too writes wonderful blog.

Both the aforementioned Goddesses have lots of wonderful, amusing , insightful and quality content.

Of course, my own Miss X is the love of my life and my Domme Extrodinaire. This state is blessed with quality powerful laldies!

Not in Washington, but a very sexy blog is MY SEXY HOTWIFE, great photos and rollicking commentary of a life serving a Hot Wife.

The weather is unseasonably warm in Seattle today, the first full day locked in chastity, and the skimpy clothes and lovely ladies strolling around Green Lake or indulging n a Baskin Robbins two scooper have no idea how they are frustrating me. Can't wait to see Miss who is due in late tonight or early tomrrow.

In my new CB-6000s, thoughts, fears and fun...

Yesterday I finally found a configuration that seems to work on the CB-6000s, the "s" standing for small cage, since my cock is so minuscule.

When I am completely soft I could pull out, but then there is no way to get back in, so for the most part, its pretty secure. Ultimately, I'll need a PA Piercing in order to be held 100 % in chastity.

This model is much more comfortable the the CB-2000 which i have tired to wear in the past and it just didn't work without damaging my cock.

Its amazing how having your cock locked up makes you feel almost instantly. Helpless, servile, silly, with an almost untenable urge to touch yourself. It is erotic and esoteric, frightening to give up the power. I am doing practice runs now until Miss X gets back.

I fantasize about a new world for me, in which I become a sexual clown for Miss X, an emotional punching bag for her sexual fun. Once I am locked up, I immediately feel less significant as a man. Not quite a woman, but a bitch nevertheless. This is scary, because I like my life as it is to a degree, but also know I need to be pushed to be the sub male I truly am.

Colorful scenarios swirl through my brain in whcih I am transformed into Miss X's foil for humiliation. More thoughts and updates to follow soon...

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Our Poll: You cruel readers!! :)

We appreciate all the participation in our poll, as of this writing, 49 of you have voted.

Nearly HALF think I should only get to cum on my birthday and major holidays! I know Miss X is taking this under advisement. Obviously, half of you are pretty damn hardcore!

On a side note, don't you just love this photo? It's simple, but one of my favorites of Miss X. I snapped it as I was driving her to a date....

The Jack Off Artist Returns....

Sadly Miss X left today, happily, its her last big business trip for a while! I should be seeing a lot more of her soon.

Today I was in the middle of a business meeting when she informed me that she had ust had wonderful experience with her well hng jack off buddy. She enjoyed letting me know that the new bed we bought was broken in by a guy who has a real cock she actually enjoys.

While my sub-standard cock is fun to punish, frustrate, hurt and twist, it has no real sexual value, other than to excite so that I mindless follow her orders. Her J/O artist came hard across her ample bust, which she always enjoys. A lusty manly undertaking I never get. He also got the fun of using her brand new fancy didlo on her..the dildo I of course proudly purchased with my hrd earned money.

When I got home, the cum rag was laying like a trophy and the dildo on the bed....for me to ponder and groan over....and long list of demand for me to accoomplish before she comes home.

In the meantime, I am feeling blue because several months ago I broke Miss X's trust and its one of those things for which I am deeply remorseful . But it doesn't just fix itself. Its like a recurring illness that won't go away. It goes into remission, then comes roaring back.This site is mostly for entertinament, but its also honest. The ony thing that will fix the issue is time, luck and honest communciation between us and the truth is, even that may not work. The prospect of living without her is not fun, but it is a reality of which I am acutely aware and until tht's resovled, there will be no true happiness...

Monday, June 29, 2009

Miss X prepares for more and GREAT NEWS!

First the great news is that Miss X's business contract is almost over and she'll be back full time after the 4th of July!! I am more excited , though it it obviously means a lot more trials and frustration for me, I'll be honored to endure.

This weekend was a lot of fun, despite me having to work some on both days. Miss X and I went to a fantastic musical event and she attended the Gay Pride parade with a group of her sexy friends.

Twice in the last few days, Miss X has been experimenting and improving her skills at ruined orgasms. Getting me close then either squishing my cock or letting her hand disappear as I reach climax, resulting in more frustration than pleasure....the agony of waiting and hoping for that special rare treat from my Mistress , ony to have it ruined..oph what could have been!

Both of us have also been enjoying a blog similiar to our, Mrs. Kelly's Playhouse. Well written, a lot of fun, we recommend!

Today, before I had to get ready for work, Miss X began to stroke me and taunt me that the expensive fancy new vibrating, pulsating wiggling vibrator I bought Her will be used by a friend of hers, a younger guy who she has known for years who loving the fact he's got an all access privelege to another man's woman.

She taunted me that not only can I not feel the wonderful pleasure of burning feeling her tight pussy wrapped around my cock. (for new readers, I am never allowed to fuck Miss X) I can't even have the fun of giving her pleasure with the very implement I bought. That's reserved for other men as well.

I was then ordered to tidy up the house so it looks nice for her mid-day lover.....

And a final real world note. I enjoy humiliation and still craving various forms of debasement. I'd like a life of semi permanent chastity, and being an ass-fucked cock sucking well flogged bit of amusement for Miss X, but it isn't always easy to find that mental space, but I know I am making progress.

Miss X is also considering opening a NiteFlirt account to take callsdiscussing the lifestyle and train other small cocked losers , sometimes while I am there so others can hear my abuse and humility... stay tuned. This is my NiteFlirt account: HumiliatedHubby.

Friday, June 26, 2009

Two girls = twice the humilation....

Last night I met Miss X's sophisticated New York fashionista I'll call "Kelli". It was awkward having chit chat. And though Kelli a slender reed of a woman, she's tough and no non-sense, having been in law enforcement and living in New York. We chatted while Miss X touched up her make-up . I felt silly because Miss X had told Kelli that she beats me, and fucks whomever she wishes. So keeping lucid conversation was tough, a thin veneer of social ettiqutte on top of my humiliating reality.

I dutifully drove them to their wine event and waited several hours for them. When they returend, both were a bit tipsy and playful. I was to drive them both back to where Kelli was staying, about forty minutes away. On this long drive home, Miss X started telling me how she saw a fellowat the wine event who she had done 13 years earlier and their chemsitry was stil alive. She bragged that he had a huge cock and for the rest of the drive, the conversation between the two girls was unbridled laughter about my tiny cock and how Miss X was going to hook up with this big stud. My face was turning red and my ego shrunk to nearly the size of tiny, but hard , cock. Miss X was busily texting her previous beau with sexy playful future "hook-up" messages.

When Miss X and i got home, she was on a high, with lots of hot big-cocked sex in her future. The wine was begning to kick in and she was sitting on the couch lamenting with earest how she wished my cock was bigger so she could fuck. This was actually one of my most humiliating moments ever, and its was so sincere, with some pelading in her voice. If I ever had a thought that she might be acting, that was vanquished as her honesty was apparent. The truth induced by the wine was transparent.

I was sitting in a large leather club chair, and Miss X got on her knees in front of me, ordered me to take my pants off, and then cackled again and the minisule nub before her. She began to stroke me, fast, then slow, fast , then slow, building me to an ass clenching crazy peak of desire, telling me that I would place an ad for a hot college dude to come over and storke for her the next day.

I writhed in passion , and she began to play with her pussy, the tight juicy pussy I am permanently denied. She was simultaneously stroking me and she enjoying it at a very deep level, the taunts and jabs at me, mocking my tiny tool , pumping it in her fist and visualizng me, her abject bitch placing her ad and getting her a real man..suddenly she came loudly, surprizing even herself. I was thrilled she came, fueled by a mix of her thoughts of seeing a real man's big young cock and the same time she was debasing me further, driving to the depths of subjectation to her. It was obviosu she was LVOING her power of me, while relishing her caranal cravings for big dick.

Then, knowing I was on the precipice of orgasm, she began to stroke me, then suck me, alternating until I announced I couldn't hodld back!!! She immediately released me and my tiny cock, began to spasm and pump thicks gobs of cum, unassocaiated with real pleasure. Tease and DENIAL at its worst. I was rewarded a rare orgasm andI felt virtually no pleasure from it. In fact, it was an excercise in pure frustration,to have my cock hanging in the air, pumping cum with zero stimulation and Miss X cackling with delight. Another ruined orgasm of epic proportions.

She was quick to bed, and I snuggled aginst her curves, craning her more and more, wanting a real orgasm, wanting to be buried deep inside her and knowing that can't happen.

This morning, I made her breakfast, fetched her a latte from Starbucks, and palced an ad for her as directed. Now I am off to work, blurry eyes with lust and subjected further into the roll of bitch-jester for her....I am off to work, and Miss X is left with opportunites...

Thursday, June 25, 2009

MISS X introduces another woman...

Today is a bit scary as Miss X has a very fashionable upscale girlfriend who is visiting from NY. I've never met her, but she is a very close friend so I ma anxious to make a good impression.

I imagined that when I finally this woman , we'll call her Kelli, I thought it would on typically vanilla terms. I was embarrassed and humiliated to find out that Miss X has told her of my submissive nature.

She called me yesterday while with her friend and told me quite plainly that I would be her chauffeur tonight as they went to an upscale wine tasting and would patiently wait for them while they sipped wine and flirted with other men.

This will be an interesting night....

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

She's Baaaaaack! And Humilaition returns....

Miss X arrived yesterday about 8pm and I was waiting for her as she requested. Nose on the floor, ass in the air, naked, exposed humiliated. Ths house was immaculate and stocked with treats and little gifts for Her.

I was waiting on my hands and knees in this position for about 15 minutes when I heard her enter. She seemed delighted to find me with my ass in the air, emasculated and there for her amusement. She chuckled and walked about, and finally handed me a present for me to wear. A rather large pig nose that you wear with an elastic string.

She taunted me, chuckled at my ridiculous position and gave me some rather hard spanks. I was stuck in my new chastity device, gladly suffering for her delight. She began to tickle my "under carriage" with a big flouncy feather and then snapped a hair clip to my tender balls.

More slaps and spanks and then a rude digital entrance into my tight asshole, that soon became a careful probing with a progressively larger bumpy hand held rubber butt stick. I need more ass training, as Mistress has made it clear I am take larger and larger dildos since I am , quite clearly, a bitch and not a man. My cock was dripping and after she was done taunting me, allowed me to rise and rejoice in her return. She looked devastatingly beautiful, dressed in all black, curve and delectiable.

We relaxed and I prepared her a small supper and wine. When she finished, she made a few calls, caught up with some friends, and then casually made a call to one of her lovers to arrange time to get a satisfying fuck and to play with the expensive, sexy multi-function dildo I bought her. More humilaition for me, but clearly an honor to provide Her with an instrument of pleasure.

Her scheduling a fuck date was driving me insane. Now unlocked and my little dick swininging in the air, she decided to pounce on me, coming across the room and in an unexpecteded frenzy, she began jacking my cock quickly with an intense fist pumping rage, then backing off just before I could cum. Then, she engulfed my entire cock for just moment in her warm soft mouth , pumping up and down, and then alternated this practice of pleasure, tease and denial. And itwas so fast and fursiou it wasnt' somethign you could quite absord or enjyo fully, more like a design to qucikly make me cum without savor. Finally she brought me right to the brink and I announced I could not hold back. She immediately backed away, and pinned my arms down and it was too late. My cock spasmed and a huge volcano of cum gushed forth, but the pleasure was minimal as she refused to touch me and denied my access to my exploding tiny pecker. It was a classic "ruined orgasm". The frustration far out-pacing any minimal pelasure I dervied. A precious rare orgasm shunted before it truly began. She laughed in wicked hsyteria, thrilled at my red face, and my retreating pathetic little dick. The orgasm that never really happened, but clearly more than I deserved. Obviously I am quite grateful.

It was so wonderful to wake up to her today, feeling her firm curvacious womanly delights. She allowed my fondeling knowing it only serves to frustrate me more and reminding me as she often does that I will never the ability to satisfy her and never feel her tight little cunt.

This will be a wonderful week!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

CB-6000s and Miss X should arrive today!

The glorious and hallowed Miss X should arrive late today. I am nervous, excited and enraptured, of course.

Obviously the prospect of being caged, teased and tormented by the wily and ever-clever Miss X is arousing and deeply scary. But I would do anything for Her and am proud to my fate her soft, supple but very strong hands.

Updates to follow...

Saturday, June 20, 2009

New Chastity Device on its way...

I am off on a short business trip so I don't have a lot of time to blog, but today I ordered a new type of chastity device that should be more secure and functionale that the last. Its called the CB-6000s, the "s" standing for small, as the cage is smaller, designed for tiny cocks like mine.

Unlike my previous CB-2000, this has a hinged opening and different style of security pins that promises not to pinch.

Being locked in chastity in a scary thing. It changes the brain chemistry and clicks on a more submissive nature. It takes a lot of discipline and trust. Obviously I am quite nervous, and would appreciate any comments, suggestions or thoughts. Since Miss X loves tease , denial humiliation and cukcolding, this new device is the perfect addition to her arsenal. Will write more soon...

Friday, June 19, 2009

Just a few more days!

The ever cruel and clever Miss X has decided that part of her continuing instance of total denial for me, she also wants me to suffer while I watch and other submissive eagerly lick her sweet pussy.

Its not enough that she proudly declares on a regular basis that I'll never have have intercourse again, especially with her, but its becoming apparent that she enjoys my utter suffering in miserable unrelenting denial, chastity and deep mind altering humiliation.

I just want to see her maginicent form again, and can't wait for her to get back home!

Thursday, June 18, 2009

The Return of Miss X

So after suffering in a bland vanilla morass, the gorgeous tempestuous Miss X is returning on Monday! I can hardly wait!!!!

For a peek into my world, here was her email to me (slightly edited for privacy):

"Hello useless groveling sub...

I will be your girlfriend when I arrive (after a suitable greeting offered by you as a sub), but after I have visited with my friend, on Sat. you will be my obedient pet; you will prepare a lunch for us (with cheese, fruit and salami), and a little libation as well. After the concert we will be attending , you may be rejuvenated and joyful, but you have not had any punishment and a long, hard spanking will be necessary. This is at my whim and discretion.

While I am home you will serve me and serve me with pleasure. Seeing as you did not send any Dilettantes, I fully expect to see some waiting for me, as well as a suitable tribute (your ass? a new dildo? femdom books? a gift card to have my hair done? a strapping young stud awaiting your call to come and service me while you watch???....)I also fully expect, that as I call you just before my arrival, you are to be prone-ass high in the air, nose touching the ground-with your door unlocked.

Looking forward to the future-

Miss X

Sunday, June 14, 2009


Its been a busy time for us both, hence the long time since our last update. Miss X is traveling on business again as am I. Fortunately, we'll be back together again next week.

I miss Miss X and her dazzling personality, devilish daring mind and saucy imagination.

Sunday, May 31, 2009


This week has been another hectic one for me and Miss X, and the last few days I've been sick with flu like symptoms.

Tonight, Miss X had been looking forward to her date her at home with a guy she's seen once before. A heavily hung 28 year old. After working all day and hurting badly most of the day, I couldn't muster up much enthusiasm.

This was discouraging to Miss X but what to do, her lover was on the way!! So we sent her real man a text explaing tht wussy me was ill. He texted back and thenc alled and Miss X out of ploite obligation explained to hi taht she was taking me out to dinner and to relax.

But you just can't deprive my glorious Mistress of cock for too long, so instead, she sent me out to bring back Chinese and shooed me away for a good hour and half. She sent me a text telling me she was coated in cum , that she was giddy and came two times.

I came home and was anxious to hear the details, but alas my Goddess had a bit too much wine so no real details were forth coming, but the evidence of her fun was right there for to me...sending me back into my roiling of stew of permanent denial and realization of my inadequacies.

I have not cum in 19 days.

Thursday, May 28, 2009


Miss X is particularly devilsh these days, giddy over meeting a couple of her lovers in the next couple days and relishing my humiliation and torture. Today she Started to taunt me by pull out my short pubic hairs one by one with tweesers and then gliding my little cock between her lips, driving me insane andIv'e had no really touching two weeks.

She very gifted at "the Tease" and can sense when I am about to peak, giggles, and backs away, leaving me moanign pelading and ready to agree to about anything. I beg to stick my cock inside her as she slide her pussy lips against my dinky shaft and laughed uproariously when i asked if i could slide in for just a moment. After keeping me on the edge for a good 40 minutes, she went about her day leaving me quite literally panting and pelading and hoping for her to real man's cock soon...fucking her hard in our bed.... so maybe, just maybe, I will get to cum....

Sunday, May 24, 2009

WHILE MISTRESS , i abide, horny and with a sore ass

Miss X is very busy these days and I've not seen for a day or to. Nevertheless, I am stuck without release and my libido beings to well up, like the little bubble chasing to the top of a pot before the water roils to a full boil.

I made the Goddess snack as a lunch, re-arranged the songs on her IPod, which took almost three hours because I had to make whole new play lists for Her, and I know she's getting that cock-hungry lust that is always there.

Miss X spanked me several times in the last few days, once for wanting to reverse a DVR 'ed TV Show she was watching and another at her whim. She's a powerful lady and not to be taken lightly.

Today is a good day for me, walking about glorious sun drenched Seattle, taunted by the scantily clad denizens of the rather trendy neighborhood in which we live. Seattle is scurrying in many directions as the crusie ships are in, The Folklife festival is at full throttle and the Mariners are in town.

This week should be rather wicked.

Friday, May 22, 2009


My glorious and exalted Mistress has been having fun lately, flirting with potential fuck buddies while continually reminding me of my Lilliputian penis.

The weather has finally turned deliciously dry and warm in Seattle (warm in Seattle is mid-60's this time of year) Its been a particularly lovely blooming season with rhododendrons and azaleas competing for bees and butterflies with the finest array of bright flowers seen here in decades. We've enjoyed the city with walks through Seattle's verdant parks and along the waterfront.

I am counting the days until Miss X must go back on the road for business with dread, but understanding. Have her ubiquitous splendor near me every day has me spoiled.

With fear, trepidation and excitement I await the arrival of my chastity device, a small cage (of course) CB-6000. Meanwhile I am regulated to the panited bitch on the sidelines while The Goddess seeks hung and horny cock monsters to satiate her omnipresent lust for pleasure.

Today she may be meeting a guy from the US Army...

Wednesday, May 20, 2009


Its been a delightful week and no new poest from me as Miss X and I have been busy with work, visitors and surfing the vanilla wave. But I never finished the last post which ended with Miss X allowing me an Earth shattering knee weakening orgasm unike any I hve ever had!

Of course now its back to denial for me.

Over the weekend, we visited the Seattle Aboretum which is splendid this time of year, the colorful Azeals and Rhodies all in spectacular array , this year in particular! We also went to the symphony and saw a Gershwin collection highlighted by Marvin Hamlisch's humor and musical brillance and a wonderful crsip verson of The Rhapsody in Blue.

This week will be heating up in the sub department and I am already in trouble for not updating This Blog.

Thursday, May 14, 2009


Yesterday Miss X had one of her long time liasions over for a little fun. For those of you following this blog, you know She loves to watch men jack off. She stares at a pumping fist likee a cat about to devour a mouse.

She had a friend over who she's known longer than me, and I was actually supposed to be gone but circumstances kept me here, so I stayed quietly n the bedroom while they chatted in the lving rooom. She let him know that i was in the other room and rather than make him nervous, it seemed to inspire him! In fact, for the first time ever, he finger banged her and I could her familiar moans of pelasure...qucikly he was cumming hard and after he was shuttled out the doors, Miss X prudly had me lick her messy fingers....

Much more happened but my time is short, so part II will follow.

Monday, May 11, 2009

A weekend of varied kink and fun!

This was a very busy weekend indeed and too much to encapsulate with the time I have to blog today, so I will hit the highlights!

Miss X and I had a delightful time strolling about beautiful Seattle on Sunday, noshing , taking in the warm sun and the plethora of fashionable boutiques. We are fortunate enough to lviv downtown, which affords us quick access to lots of wonderful venues.

Friday night we went to a private "mingles" party where like minded sex focused others gathered and it was a bit slow and pokey but the people were very nice; we shall return next week. On Saturday, we had a long frank talk and wrote down our thoughts and game plan for each other. "Communication is so critical." The phrase is trite, the practice is not and it is an acquired art form requiring dicsipline and mutual respect. We laid down some rules and guideposts for each other, recognizing that our relationship has to remain supple and flexibile and at the same time, stout.

She also devleoped a list of things for me accomplish this week, including finding her more suitable fuck buddies. Shamefully, a task I much enjoy.

Miss X decided to shave my chest hair and pubic region, a humiliating experience, and she enjoys the removal of the last vestiages of masculinitny that are remianing. I am now to be nude or in panties when home with her, my bald little cock bouncing about to her giggles and gaffaws.

She also wrote in huge letters across my stomach "CUCKOLD PUSSY" and a "Tiny Dick" with an arrow sign poiting down and ordered me to wear this all week to keep me immersered in the reality of my plight.

Many times through the weekend, she brought me to the brink of orgasm, watching me writhe and wriggle in unededing torture. She also extended my cahstity until next Friday because I coudl not find a magazine she wanted.

Lastly, she also anounced that she would be doing no housework, that was all up to me now.

Tomorrow, Miss X has a very special event planned for me! Check back to read the details...

Saturday, May 9, 2009

Writhing in a submissive mental state

Miss X liked the email I send her yesterday and ordered me to post it for all to read as further humilation for me.

i woke today feeling mentally molded and chained to my Goddess. My balls are heavy and my deep cravings pounding through my arteries and veins like a mind controlling drug. I am mentally becoming resigned to your whims.

Your steady daily flow of cutting words are brain washing me into truly being your chaste and helpless bitch, owned by you and dependant on living my life adhered to your whims and smirks, feeling your love and disdain in equal quantities.

I woke up dreaming of giving your little pussy a heartfelt kiss, a silent acknowledgment to that which controls me and that i can have never have and don't deserve. I want to be shaved and emasculated for you, hairless and pantied and ridiculed.

I dream of the days when muscled big cocked men are driving deep into you, and you look into my eyes with that satisfied look that only a good fuck can bring...you knowing the pain and shame I am enduring, wanting so much to be the one inside you and knowing it just can't be. Seeing you spoiled by the big dick I can't ever give you.

Wanting to share my life with you as your darling pathetic cherished pet that can never give you what a real man should. Living a life where you remind me of my place, loved as not other, while at the bottom of the your totem pole.
Teased to the bring, manipulated, slowly trained to crave pain as much as pleasure. Confusing your love for a slap. Relish your tender touch, your slightest brush your lightest frustrating touch on my cock and your bitch slaps and spankings with equal desire.

Craving your lick on my cock as much as your humiliating comments. Always striving to impress you.

Always trying to prove my worth you. Loving you as a girlfriend and a Mistress with equal amounts of effort and sincerity.

I'm off to work, with my desire roiling, realizing I can't cum for another week, resigned grudgingly to that frustrating fact and understanding it is what is best for me,

love and humility.,


Thursday, May 7, 2009


Another great day, worked hard and got off a bit early and picked up the delicious Miss X in a rainy Seattle city scene then scuttled her off to a fashionable cafe and wine bar where we snacked on interesting and varied flat bread selections.

Light conversation lingered as we watched the rain fade to drizzle and the collection of eclectic Seattle eccentrics mosey to and fro. We left and zig zagged through the city's hilly posh neighborhoods for fun and during this sojourn, she reiterated with the clarity of a ringing bell that I would never have intercourse again. There was a time when she shied away from this notion, but now she's bought in and truly seems to relish the absolute and unequivocal denial. But to add to my shame, she insisted that my only sexual release will be to make myself available to men both orally and rectally for her amusement. Shamefully, this direct type of debasement sends tingles of excitement and devotion through me, and yet scares me.

Eventually, we ended back home. Miss X had me on the bed, nude and at her mercy. She began to play with me, taunting me with a seductive glare, amused at my pleading eyes and writhing form.

And then she did that thing that sends me into a frenzy, a single finger sliding up and down the underside of my cock, lubed with baby oil and driving me insane! She'd stoke me close then leave to play on the computer, and search for real men...After twenty minutes of my agony, she told me I could cum if I could take 15 hard spanks. Now Miss X Is by far the strongest woman I've known, and delivered a solid 15 spanks, the final hard blow using a thick book.

She wouldn't jack me off, but allowed me to cum which to her surprise, I refused. YEAH! I refused, which was very difficult, but I wanted to show Her that I was serious in my devotion. This act of sincerity brought no particular mercy from the Goddess, though. She told me I'd have to wait another week! Another week. (sigh) Another week.

A day of fun and filthy fantasies..

Miss X and I had a lovely yesterday...we chatted over morning coffee and went about our morning rituals, including a peek a the highlights of American Idol on DVR. I'm an Idolite and music fantatic and will share my favorite moments with Miss X.
We then drove about and wandered through the city , something we both enjoy before stopping for lunch as one of our favorite neighborhood spots. The highlight of the day was a long frank conversation about some painful events in the past for us both. Its cathartic and useful to illumainte some gnawing mental tribulations. Sunlight cures dark corners. We are communicating better than ever, mostly due to some commitments I've made to being more open, and Miss X is also very measured and serene in her ability to explain her feelings to me in a thoughtful non-confrontational style.
We also made plans for a VERY naughty weekend, you'll jsut have to come back to this blog to hear about it . HINT: More big cocks for Miss X, more frustration for me. Miss X sent me reeling with one she verablized one of her rediculously demented fantasties that rocked me to the core, while intriquing and delighting me. She'd like to get a big well hung dominate guy to come over. I would be sent to the bedroom with the orders that I was not to disturb Misstress for any reason while she watched her favorite television show. Of course, while the show was on, the male Dom could do anything he wanted with me, and my cries and pleas would be ignored. In fact, I'd have to be quiet so as not to distrub Mistress.

She envisions me being orally raped, choking on his big cock, and being violated in the most degrading way while she nibbles on a little plate of snack I prepared for her, drinking her wine and letting the Dom enjoy his victim. Of course, this disturbingly horriffic and deeply erotic story has kept my little cock turgid ever since.

Midday, Miss X and I parted ways and she spent the night at a friends while I worked. Its been a week since I've cum, and the haivng Her back in my midst, teasing me and taunting me is driving me insane with desire . It is amazing how changes my attitudes and perspectives. If more men were kept chaste, it would be a different a world, indeed.

Wednesday, May 6, 2009


So its no secret that Ms. X loves to watch thick big cock, its always been one of her most stalwart personal fetishes. And why not? There are plenty of men, millions even, who would love to stoke their man-meat while a beautiful woman licks her lips and watches intently. In fact, Ms. X has a few hung fellows she's seen occassionally over the years who are respectful, prompt and delighted to have an opportunity to perform. Let's face it, this is VERY erotic. And if Miss X is in the mood and likes the bloke, he might get a little head and maybe, just maybe, a little more!

But here's the rub (pun intentional). .. You would think a simple Craig's List ad would be a slam dunk easy way to recruit lovers and jerkers for the Fabulous, sensual, delightful Miss X. Not so! While she has met some delightful people this way, including moi, her future husband, the site is rife with phony players, flakes and phonies. To wit: two nights ago a guy insisted he was coming over, we had his phone number, he said he was coming, we waited an hour and ...NO SHOW! He text messaged me the next day and said he had an "emergency". Sure ya did, assbite. Oh well, there's always tomrrow.

The next day: We are fortuante enough to live in a very trendy Seattle waterfront neighborhood, so last night we ventured to some wonderful happy hours and imbibed a bit early in some wine and amazing appertizers. The conversation was light and fun, including Her assertion that on our weeding night I wil not be fucking her, it'll be the man or men of her choice to connsuamte our marraige and put and exclaimation point on the futlity of my sexual abilites, including the possiblity of an old lover of her's of whom I amquite jealous. A strapping guy she once proclaimed broought her the best knee weakening oragasm of her life. A firefighter with perfect pecs.

So the mood was pefect and Miss X decided that , well, what the hell... she was a feeling happy, why not get a guy to come over RIGHT NOW and pound her little tight pussy hard while I watched helplessly as a bigger man ravaged her. Cock procurement is a primamary function of mine as her subby cuck. Our ad clearly said she was READY NOW.

The first guy said he was coming from a suburb 20 minutes away and he had to "take a quick shower." A few texts and POOF, he disappaered, another NO SHOW. Cleverly, I had a back up, a guy "10 minutes away". He said he'd come over, then lamley explained he was getting tired. another NO SHOW. My final option was a big strapping black dude who also said he could come over, but later said "tomorrow or so will be better" another NO SHOW.

By now the mood was gone, Miss X was snoozing and I was watching American Idol, my little cock, as usual, oozing pre cum and thumping with frustration. The bottom line is I failed in my mission to get Miss X the cock she needed so I am sure in the coming days I will be punished for this. But it amazes both of us how many men are simply pathetic wankers without follow-through.

Monday, May 4, 2009


Miss X arrived last night and we enjoyed a delightful lunch, and my thoughts drifted off to her meeting with a new fellow who was simply going to jack off for her...she loves to watch big cocks and since she's stuck with mine, who can blame her?

When we arrived home, Miss X began teasing me...playing with me here and there. Giving me a "faux job", her mouth hovering over my cock, with an occassional lick to remind me of the greatness other men get. Driving me insane with the one finger trick. Amazing how one finger and a little baby oil can make a man crazy! Her reasing is delicious cruel...occassionaly feding me my pre-cum and laughing at my patheticness.

Soon she was primping and preening, making herself beautiful for the arrival of her new friend. She ordered me to get her a glass of wine and I took a sip from her glass without asking. I was ordered to stand before her and she dielvered a sold blow to my balls which sent me stumbling bakcwards onto the bed, much to her dleight as proven byher hearty giggles. I won't make that mistake again!

Her date arrived and I sat duitfully in the bed room, listening to theie light conversation, in my pool of humiality as I herad her gush over his huge cock. She twittered about how much bigger he was than me, at least twice as large. There conversation ended and I herd the unmistakable sounds of her givng a luciosu blow job. This would not just be a jerk off session, and that was validated shortly thereafter by her ecstatic monas as his big pole entred her, I could hear the greatfullness in her voice from being filled fully with real cock.

Me? Sitting helpleesly with my tiny useless nub, greatful my Mistress was getting the pleasure she so deserves.

The deep groanns contnued untl her pulled out, whipped off his condom and came copiously across her ample bosom. Soon, she was drifitng into a satisfied sleep, while I was left cleaning up the condom wrappers, beer and wine glasses, etc..I wanted to taste her well used pussy, but that would be for another day...

Sunday, May 3, 2009

An Email from Miss X to share

Here's a peek into the wonderful (and sometimes scary) world in which I live....I received permission from the glorious Miss X to publish this email she sent me yesterday before she arrived back in town:

"You will be treating me like the true Goddess that I am this coming week. you know what that means. you are nothing to me-a useless man until I see that you can prove your worth to me (do I see a good cocksucking in the future?); I want for you to tell me how much you care and value me, how I have treated you lovingly and with respect because I do understand you, I do know you and now you have the glorious opportunity to show it to me. Show me your love and devotion because actions speak louder than words, and I want you to shout it from the rooftop. I want to tie you up; I can be gentle-how you've sorely underestimated me. I will start out slow, but I will also make you howl in pain, and your buttocks glisten with a sweet plump redness. you will want more. you will need more. I will burn into your mind like a hot ember-never dying, only growing. you know this. you can't deny it. you cant hide. Even in your mind you know that I am your superior, and so real, I put you to shame. you will know this as I feed you your own pitiful dribbling salty cum. you will know this as I rub ice cubes along your ass crack, you will know this as I attatch clothespins to your nut sack. you will know how much I adore my litte sub when you open your mouth, (perhaps with a shade of "rio red" on?) and be my bitch. you will enjoy this as much as I enjoy telling you to do so. do you fully understand? do you? Miss X"

The kinkfest is on!

Today's post will be brief as I have a had a very busy day, both working and scrubbing the house in anticipation of Miss X's return. Shopping for her favorite foods, wine, etc..

Today I placed two ads at Miss X's direction. The first is for large cocked men to come over and jack off for her. Of course, if at any point she finds the guy attrative and as the incliation, she just might fuck them. That's always her right.

The second is a similar ad, except the guy is to jack off on me, while she enjoys the humiliating show. Details and maybe even pictures to follow...

Saturday, May 2, 2009

SCRUB BUT NO RUB, preparing for the Goddess..

Today is the day before the Goddess return so I am busy preparing for Her. Scrubbing the house and the tub (she loves to take long sensuous baths) scurrying to get candles and flowers and wines and chocolates.

I also dutifully make sure she has condoms and cute things to wear in case she decides to indulge in a lover while she's back in town.

But of course, its strictly "scrub but no rub" . No masturbation for me, so my excitement builds and my servile nature deepens.

I was ordered to place a CL ad for possible masturbaters for the Goddess to watch and she narrowed it down to about ten candidates, all, of course, with substantially larger cocks than mine.

I'm off to work (my day) job, but will post daily as the week unfolds.

Friday, May 1, 2009

The Goddess returns Sunday, and its gonna get wild!

The gorgeous and glorious Miss X will be returning from a prolonged bunisness trip on Sunday, and she's ordered me to get some sexy items for her as its my job to assist her to be prepared in case she decides to fuck a man with a real cock,
a pleasure stick, not a small laughable nub as she reminds me often.

Tonight she taunted me with memories of one of her favorite lovers of yore, a straping hard bodied man with a big dick and the skill to make her curvy craving body weak with pleasure and rosy with unrelenting desire.

This coming (cumming?) week will be filled with pleasure for her and the typical unyeilding humailtion for me as she reminds that I am here to humor her as her sexless lump of servitude, pin cushion and servile man-cunt.

As I sufffer through teainsg, its as if she's opened a trap door in the a mental dungeon and pushes me tumbling helpless to my fate of crining immodesty. I want to be a man, a real man, but clearly I can never really be. I am not equipped to satisfy a hot, cock-loving lovely creature like herself. So the best I can do is amuse her, provide for her and suffer for her..frolicing in my desperation to be noticed.

Its my job to continually prove me devotion by degrading myself...its my way of serving at her altar.

Thursday, April 30, 2009

Misc. Musings

Today I continued my new attitude of revealing all my darkest fantasies and Miss X has enjoyed them all which gives me a warm, loved feeling I can't really describe except to say that being so transparent AND being accepted makes me feel privileged.

There are many subs who withhold themselves for fear of ultimately being rejected for being "too" weird. Sadly, that can be a real danger as some women can become quite judgmental. Miss X is a delight in that being transparent with her is just more fullfilling, more wonderful. Lucky guy? Yeah, I am!

As we are currently apart due to business reasons, we had a great text exchange and conversation. She reiterated today how I simply can't satisfy her in the sexual needs department, taunting me about her desires to entertain herself with more worthy, bigger, younger well hung men. She laughed at my "catch 22" situation that the more big cock she has, the more rediculous it would be for me to fuck her. Why settle for hamburger when Filet Mignon is always on your plate?

I don't think I've ever met a woman who so genuinely loves to watch and play with a man's cock. In fact, she gets a big kick out of seeing a man cum (except me of course) Since she'll be back in town this weekend, I am tasked with writing a personals ad for her so that she can have a man or two come jack off for her. Obviously this is my duty as her slave, procurement of bigger guys to satiate her cock-lust.

Stay tuned.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Cummer's Remorse

Miss X is out of own and this morning I felt the overwelming undisiciplined urge to jack off. Tesed and denied subs will totally relate to what I call "Cummer's Remorse". The truth is I am submissive in my sexual thoughts 90% of the time, and this is amplified when I am teased and denied. However, immediately after I cum I feel a chemical let-down. A sense of remorse and rediculousness at my behavior prior. The orgasms feel great and even neccesary sometimes, but the feeling directly after climax and lingering for a short while is that of disdain for my submissiveness and a desire to foresake it and be the Type A macho guy.

That happened today, and it disappated within twenty mintures. Most men won't talk of this, but its important for Dommes to know. It is chemical, it is short lived and it is real.

There's no sense in getting angry at your bitch, leave him alone, then tease him back up and he'll be ready to be your bitch once more!

Fantasy: Total Cock Control

I woke this morning with a fairly unrealistic but powerful fantasy of Ms. X taking total control of my cock. Last week she teased me that I'll never have pussy again for the rest of my life. (meaning intercourse)

I envision this powerful world in which I am never allowed to touch my cock because it is no longer mine. She owns it, its Mistress' property. I envision a life as a quasi eunuch, trained to love the gnawing unrelenting desire and devotion to The Goddess.

Having her whisper sweetly in my ear that she loves my suffering and my tribute to her by making the ultimate male sacrifice. She giggles at my predicament, and relishes the lines of frustration that cross my face and she softly plays with my cock...and my mesmerized unspoken pleading.

Perhaps she'll allow me to sit on the couch and she'll take a a tiny drop of baby oil and lightly massage the underside of my cock, creating a throbbing bouncing cock, craving to be held or stroke..but no, she simply rubs the tender little spot that keeps me craving, occasionally making me beg to taste a drop of pre-cum,and then reminding me that no real man would be feed his jizz like a baby bird.

Other times she might use my desire for her sadistic desires. Perhaps she'll promise me a nice long stroke and maybe (maybe) release, only if I will take 50 hard swats with a paddle. My ass glowing red, my chance to cum still totally at her whim. Maybe I'll be made to beg for five more, ten more..and still I might be denied? Its up to Her.

Maybe she's feeling devilish and craving cock. So she has me stand in front of her and explain to her in detail why I am wholly inadequate to pleasure her. Maybe she explains she wants to give a mouth filling blow job, gives me a few little lick,s and then tells me her mouth is reserved today for an actual cock, not a tiny clitty dick.

Perhaps she makes the pronouncement that anytime I cum its a tribute to her, so no drop is to be wasted in the future and I must recycle every orgasms by licking it all up for her. Degrading? Yes. Difficult to do? Yes. Thrilling? Oh God yes...

I see this wonderland of enforced chastity where my only hope for release is by providing Miss X with quality service, devotion and humiliation for Her amusement. Floating though life resigned to being her trained bitch, while she proudly enjoys the deep gratifying pleasures I am continually denied.