A day of fun and filthy fantasies..

Miss X and I had a lovely yesterday...we chatted over morning coffee and went about our morning rituals, including a peek a the highlights of American Idol on DVR. I'm an Idolite and music fantatic and will share my favorite moments with Miss X.

We then drove about and wandered through the city , something we both enjoy before stopping for lunch as one of our favorite neighborhood spots. The highlight of the day was a long frank conversation about some painful events in the past for us both. Its cathartic and useful to illumainte some gnawing mental tribulations. Sunlight cures dark corners. We are communicating better than ever, mostly due to some commitments I've made to being more open, and Miss X is also very measured and serene in her ability to explain her feelings to me in a thoughtful non-confrontational style.

We also made plans for a VERY naughty weekend, you'll jsut have to come back to this blog to hear about it . HINT: More big cocks for Miss X, more frustration for me. Miss X sent me reeling with one she verablized one of her rediculously demented fantasties that rocked me to the core, while intriquing and delighting me. She'd like to get a big well hung dominate guy to come over. I would be sent to the bedroom with the orders that I was not to disturb Misstress for any reason while she watched her favorite television show. Of course, while the show was on, the male Dom could do anything he wanted with me, and my cries and pleas would be ignored. In fact, I'd have to be quiet so as not to distrub Mistress.

She envisions me being orally raped, choking on his big cock, and being violated in the most degrading way while she nibbles on a little plate of snack I prepared for her, drinking her wine and letting the Dom enjoy his victim. Of course, this disturbingly horriffic and deeply erotic story has kept my little cock turgid ever since.

Midday, Miss X and I parted ways and she spent the night at a friends while I worked. Its been a week since I've cum, and the haivng Her back in my midst, teasing me and taunting me is driving me insane with desire . It is amazing how changes my attitudes and perspectives. If more men were kept chaste, it would be a different a world, indeed.

JACK OFF JACK OFFS!

So its no secret that Ms. X loves to watch thick big cock, its always been one of her most stalwart personal fetishes. And why not? There are plenty of men, millions even, who would love to stoke their man-meat while a beautiful woman licks her lips and watches intently. In fact, Ms. X has a few hung fellows she's seen occassionally over the years who are respectful, prompt and delighted to have an opportunity to perform. Let's face it, this is VERY erotic. And if Miss X is in the mood and likes the bloke, he might get a little head and maybe, just maybe, a little more!

But here's the rub (pun intentional). .. You would think a simple Craig's List ad would be a slam dunk easy way to recruit lovers and jerkers for the Fabulous, sensual, delightful Miss X. Not so! While she has met some delightful people this way, including moi, her future husband, the site is rife with phony players, flakes and phonies. To wit: two nights ago a guy insisted he was coming over, we had his phone number, he said he was coming, we waited an hour and ...NO SHOW! He text messaged me the next day and said he had an "emergency". Sure ya did, assbite. Oh well, there's always tomrrow.

The next day: We are fortuante enough to live in a very trendy Seattle waterfront neighborhood, so last night we ventured to some wonderful happy hours and imbibed a bit early in some wine and amazing appertizers. The conversation was light and fun, including Her assertion that on our weeding night I wil not be fucking her, it'll be the man or men of her choice to connsuamte our marraige and put and exclaimation point on the futlity of my sexual abilites, including the possiblity of an old lover of her's of whom I amquite jealous. A strapping guy she once proclaimed broought her the best knee weakening oragasm of her life. A firefighter with perfect pecs.

So the mood was pefect and Miss X decided that , well, what the hell... she was a feeling happy, why not get a guy to come over RIGHT NOW and pound her little tight pussy hard while I watched helplessly as a bigger man ravaged her. Cock procurement is a primamary function of mine as her subby cuck. Our ad clearly said she was READY NOW.

The first guy said he was coming from a suburb 20 minutes away and he had to "take a quick shower." A few texts and POOF, he disappaered, another NO SHOW. Cleverly, I had a back up, a guy "10 minutes away". He said he'd come over, then lamley explained he was getting tired. another NO SHOW. My final option was a big strapping black dude who also said he could come over, but later said "tomorrow or so will be better" another NO SHOW.

By now the mood was gone, Miss X was snoozing and I was watching American Idol, my little cock, as usual, oozing pre cum and thumping with frustration. The bottom line is I failed in my mission to get Miss X the cock she needed so I am sure in the coming days I will be punished for this. But it amazes both of us how many men are simply pathetic wankers without follow-through.

MONDAY NIGHT FROLIC,,,

Miss X arrived last night and we enjoyed a delightful lunch, and my thoughts drifted off to her meeting with a new fellow who was simply going to jack off for her...she loves to watch big cocks and since she's stuck with mine, who can blame her?

When we arrived home, Miss X began teasing me...playing with me here and there. Giving me a "faux job", her mouth hovering over my cock, with an occassional lick to remind me of the greatness other men get. Driving me insane with the one finger trick. Amazing how one finger and a little baby oil can make a man crazy! Her reasing is delicious cruel...occassionaly feding me my pre-cum and laughing at my patheticness.

Soon she was primping and preening, making herself beautiful for the arrival of her new friend. She ordered me to get her a glass of wine and I took a sip from her glass without asking. I was ordered to stand before her and she dielvered a sold blow to my balls which sent me stumbling bakcwards onto the bed, much to her dleight as proven byher hearty giggles. I won't make that mistake again!

Her date arrived and I sat duitfully in the bed room, listening to theie light conversation, in my pool of humiality as I herad her gush over his huge cock. She twittered about how much bigger he was than me, at least twice as large. There conversation ended and I herd the unmistakable sounds of her givng a luciosu blow job. This would not just be a jerk off session, and that was validated shortly thereafter by her ecstatic monas as his big pole entred her, I could hear the greatfullness in her voice from being filled fully with real cock.

Me? Sitting helpleesly with my tiny useless nub, greatful my Mistress was getting the pleasure she so deserves.

The deep groanns contnued untl her pulled out, whipped off his condom and came copiously across her ample bosom. Soon, she was drifitng into a satisfied sleep, while I was left cleaning up the condom wrappers, beer and wine glasses, etc..I wanted to taste her well used pussy, but that would be for another day...

An Email from Miss X to share

Here's a peek into the wonderful (and sometimes scary) world in which I live....I received permission from the glorious Miss X to publish this email she sent me yesterday before she arrived back in town:

"You will be treating me like the true Goddess that I am this coming week. you know what that means. you are nothing to me-a useless man until I see that you can prove your worth to me (do I see a good cocksucking in the future?); I want for you to tell me how much you care and value me, how I have treated you lovingly and with respect because I do understand you, I do know you and now you have the glorious opportunity to show it to me. Show me your love and devotion because actions speak louder than words, and I want you to shout it from the rooftop. I want to tie you up; I can be gentle-how you've sorely underestimated me. I will start out slow, but I will also make you howl in pain, and your buttocks glisten with a sweet plump redness. you will want more. you will need more. I will burn into your mind like a hot ember-never dying, only growing. you know this. you can't deny it. you cant hide. Even in your mind you know that I am your superior, and so real, I put you to shame. you will know this as I feed you your own pitiful dribbling salty cum. you will know this as I rub ice cubes along your ass crack, you will know this as I attatch clothespins to your nut sack. you will know how much I adore my litte sub when you open your mouth, (perhaps with a shade of "rio red" on?) and be my bitch. you will enjoy this as much as I enjoy telling you to do so. do you fully understand? do you? Miss X"

The kinkfest is on!

Today's post will be brief as I have a had a very busy day, both working and scrubbing the house in anticipation of Miss X's return. Shopping for her favorite foods, wine, etc..

Today I placed two ads at Miss X's direction. The first is for large cocked men to come over and jack off for her. Of course, if at any point she finds the guy attrative and as the incliation, she just might fuck them. That's always her right.

The second is a similar ad, except the guy is to jack off on me, while she enjoys the humiliating show. Details and maybe even pictures to follow...

SCRUB BUT NO RUB, preparing for the Goddess..

Today is the day before the Goddess return so I am busy preparing for Her. Scrubbing the house and the tub (she loves to take long sensuous baths) scurrying to get candles and flowers and wines and chocolates.

I also dutifully make sure she has condoms and cute things to wear in case she decides to indulge in a lover while she's back in town.

But of course, its strictly "scrub but no rub" . No masturbation for me, so my excitement builds and my servile nature deepens.

I was ordered to place a CL ad for possible masturbaters for the Goddess to watch and she narrowed it down to about ten candidates, all, of course, with substantially larger cocks than mine.

I'm off to work (my day) job, but will post daily as the week unfolds.

The Goddess returns Sunday, and its gonna get wild!

The gorgeous and glorious Miss X will be returning from a prolonged bunisness trip on Sunday, and she's ordered me to get some sexy items for her as its my job to assist her to be prepared in case she decides to fuck a man with a real cock,

a pleasure stick, not a small laughable nub as she reminds me often.

Tonight she taunted me with memories of one of her favorite lovers of yore, a straping hard bodied man with a big dick and the skill to make her curvy craving body weak with pleasure and rosy with unrelenting desire.

This coming (cumming?) week will be filled with pleasure for her and the typical unyeilding humailtion for me as she reminds that I am here to humor her as her sexless lump of servitude, pin cushion and servile man-cunt.

As I sufffer through teainsg, its as if she's opened a trap door in the a mental dungeon and pushes me tumbling helpless to my fate of crining immodesty. I want to be a man, a real man, but clearly I can never really be. I am not equipped to satisfy a hot, cock-loving lovely creature like herself. So the best I can do is amuse her, provide for her and suffer for her..frolicing in my desperation to be noticed.

Its my job to continually prove me devotion by degrading myself...its my way of serving at her altar.